Since last night I've been busy, busy, busy. I'm overhauling my life a small section at a time. I have gotten rid of/chucked so much stuff, honestly I don't know where it comes from. The sad thing is that I've done SO much work but you can't even really tell. I can tell - I feel better letting this stuff just go - but, my living quarters are still a disaster.
I just finished cleaning my window a/c unit. Took me about an hour. I took the front plate off, which I've never done, and blech, it was disgusting. I bleached and cleaned the entire thing until it (90%) resembles itself when I first took it from its' box.
I don't even know why I feel the need to live with bare essentials. My entire life I never gave a second thought to the stuff I had, but one day, about three years ago, I got this over powering urge to purge. If it's not being used, has bad memories with it, I simply just don't like it... it had to go. But as I am human and I like stuff, it's been a continuous struggle ever since.
I'm constantly plagued by 'Oh, but what if I'll need this?', 'Oh, but I had plans for this.', & 'Oh, but I just got this.' And since I'm not perfect, I hold onto the items that fit into those categories, even though my brain is saying, "Just chuck it already, will ya!"
Apparently I'm on the right course as I haven't missed a damn thing I've thrown out and I feel better every time I let it all go.
And!! I am commending myself for all the work I've accomplished since last night. I'm even going to reward myself with a matinee showing of Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace in 3D tomorrow.
Huzzah, indeed. I know, I know. Another money grabbing gimmick by Mr. Lucas. I'll even admit I had absolutely no interest in seeing this film again in the theatre, much less in 3D. Don't get me wrong, I do like the film. I like the new three. They'll never compare in greatness to the original three, but I do really like them (& own them on DVD, even). But, it was all the hoopla being generated online and in real life. It was like it was 1999 all over again. 1999 was a good year for me. I miss some of the good times that were had during that year. Seeing Epi I (twice) was a good memory for me.
Suddenly I felt this longing need to recapture that memory that happened (almost) thirteen years ago. A sudden bout of nostalgia. I know it won't be the same. For one, I won't be seeing this with my dad or my sister. The theatre we saw it in has been closed for about five or so years. Nor will my Star Wars loving friend be there (as was the case with my second viewing, since it was her Star Wars birthday extravaganza).
I am well aware that one can never go back and times can never be recaptured. I learned that lesson when I was ten. So, I'm not really going into this to recapture a moment or reclaim my youth (though it was my initial thought), but instead I realized this could be my way of recapturing the past while making a new memory in simply just seeing this film, in 3D, by myself.
There's no telling. I may leave the theatre all morose with tears streaming down my face (cursing Lucas) realizing that the last thirteen years are gone. (Oh man, has it really been so long since Quai Gon died and Obi Wan was a padiwan?) I am thirteen years closer to my ultimate demise. There has been thirteen years of heart break, let downs, deaths, changes, happy and sad times. I will realize that those are thirteen years I can not get back, can not do over, can never have again.
But, perhaps I have just done that, so tomorrow will just be seeing a film I once saw and am able to see again.
I just finished cleaning my window a/c unit. Took me about an hour. I took the front plate off, which I've never done, and blech, it was disgusting. I bleached and cleaned the entire thing until it (90%) resembles itself when I first took it from its' box.
I don't even know why I feel the need to live with bare essentials. My entire life I never gave a second thought to the stuff I had, but one day, about three years ago, I got this over powering urge to purge. If it's not being used, has bad memories with it, I simply just don't like it... it had to go. But as I am human and I like stuff, it's been a continuous struggle ever since.
I'm constantly plagued by 'Oh, but what if I'll need this?', 'Oh, but I had plans for this.', & 'Oh, but I just got this.' And since I'm not perfect, I hold onto the items that fit into those categories, even though my brain is saying, "Just chuck it already, will ya!"
Apparently I'm on the right course as I haven't missed a damn thing I've thrown out and I feel better every time I let it all go.
And!! I am commending myself for all the work I've accomplished since last night. I'm even going to reward myself with a matinee showing of Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace in 3D tomorrow.
Huzzah, indeed. I know, I know. Another money grabbing gimmick by Mr. Lucas. I'll even admit I had absolutely no interest in seeing this film again in the theatre, much less in 3D. Don't get me wrong, I do like the film. I like the new three. They'll never compare in greatness to the original three, but I do really like them (& own them on DVD, even). But, it was all the hoopla being generated online and in real life. It was like it was 1999 all over again. 1999 was a good year for me. I miss some of the good times that were had during that year. Seeing Epi I (twice) was a good memory for me.
Suddenly I felt this longing need to recapture that memory that happened (almost) thirteen years ago. A sudden bout of nostalgia. I know it won't be the same. For one, I won't be seeing this with my dad or my sister. The theatre we saw it in has been closed for about five or so years. Nor will my Star Wars loving friend be there (as was the case with my second viewing, since it was her Star Wars birthday extravaganza).
I am well aware that one can never go back and times can never be recaptured. I learned that lesson when I was ten. So, I'm not really going into this to recapture a moment or reclaim my youth (though it was my initial thought), but instead I realized this could be my way of recapturing the past while making a new memory in simply just seeing this film, in 3D, by myself.
There's no telling. I may leave the theatre all morose with tears streaming down my face (cursing Lucas) realizing that the last thirteen years are gone. (Oh man, has it really been so long since Quai Gon died and Obi Wan was a padiwan?) I am thirteen years closer to my ultimate demise. There has been thirteen years of heart break, let downs, deaths, changes, happy and sad times. I will realize that those are thirteen years I can not get back, can not do over, can never have again.
But, perhaps I have just done that, so tomorrow will just be seeing a film I once saw and am able to see again.
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